this is amy. the small petlike person from the womens bathroom at the reef.
his dad told me thanks for making his little boy a man at breakfast this morning
I have to brush my teeth today to feel like I did something.
you asked a group of latinas stood by the bar to hold a minutes silence for ugly betty getting cancelled. that drunk.
would it be subtle enough if I played birthday sex on repeat while I may or may not be stripping?
Clearly he doesn't understand my need to be surrounded by cats at all times
I just had sex on a bear rug. My life is complete.
Found out why I didn't have to go drug test. My boss grew pot to pay for grad school.
Dude if our hands were ladels we could work at a soup kitchen
That would be so convenient
he pulled a $400 bottle of champagne out of the back part of his toiled and I was ready to blow him then and there
I totally accidentally said "we don't go around hammering girls in the rear" in front of 132 5th graders today.
He's living a porn movie. He's slept with a waitress at her work for lunch, a bar tender at the bar that night, and the cleaning lady the next morning.
i woke up soaking wet with shard of glass imbedded in my flesh dangerously close to my dick what happend?!!
BEER BOTTLE SWORD FIGHTHING!!
Drinking wine from a straw at 6:15 in the morning. This is what college does to people.
He said he wanted to sit next to the fountain so he could "watch the water hit the other water".
Randomize
