Who has a tranny cab driver? I have a tranny cab driver.
Haha im Trying. This detox stuff tastes nasty. It's bad when the only thing that came to mind when i took the first sip was how good it would be with Vodka
Although last time you were unsure about someone they flipped a golf cart on me.
A kid in my class brought a George Foreman and cooked food mid lecture. When the prof found out, all the kid did was ask if he wanted some.
so why was i the only one who woke up with ham stuck to my ass?
I woke up in bed alone w 2 bite marks on my boob... Salt and pepper shakers In my purse along w a bottle of steak sauce.... The drunkasauraus has struck again
Are you high right now?
is that a question or a drake reference?
We're high and this subject came up and I'd like a female opinion: if you were a dude, what would you do if a girl tried to give you a foot job?
I'm going to smoke the pathetic stems and miscellaneous particles that weren't good enough for all my other bowls because its all I have left. This is my bag's Rudy moment.
Is re-gifting a Valentine's Day present worse than re-gifting a Xmas one?
You're unbelievable, unbelievably awesome.
It's like your nipple is comforting my nipple.
If I just skip sleeping, does hangover still happen? Gonna try it. Will report back. StTAND BY
My doctor said I can only have one drink at a time, ever, from now on. My life has officially started its decline.
Are you alone?
No, but I have to leave him in my bed while I go on this date.
It'd be good to change things up a bit, right now the only public service I'm doing from my apt is hanging out in my underwear with the lights on.
Randomize
