We went to his house and he brought a jar of pickles to bed. I think im in love.
I wore a leash I'll tell you about it later I had a fantastic time
French fry pizza
Are you brilliant or just really high?
Can't it be both?
She came to the party with six kegs and a life sized portrait of Lavar Burton. SHE WILL BE MY WIFE.
Saw you fall down on Jefferson and a cop drove by and shook his head. How you didnt get arrested after the party you went to on saturday is beyond me.
I woke up to a full mcdonalds meal being shoved in my face. Mom mustve noticed the empty tequila bottle. I love family.
I also tried to solve my dog's itching problem with crystal healing. I'm so high, dude.
I just rubbed amethyst all over him and kept saying 'no bites.'
Hold your horses dude. Titty pics are a work of art.
Is it too early in the day to ask a nipple-related question?
I know he’s a bad decision but he's casual, his penis is amazing and his technique is on point.
She said she was sorry for rolling around in her own vomit. Honestly, I thought it really added to the party.
FINE. BE CELIBATE AND ACCUMULATE CATS. SEE IF I CARE.
Legal advice please. Can you sue someone for jerking off to photos of you?
Trust me, I’ve got a sixth sense about dicks that tells me if a guy knows how to fuck and it’s tingling. You need to prove me right!
I’m not going to bang him just to confirm your Dickth Sense
The Dickth Sense!!! I love it! It’ll be our first porno!
fell asleep while jerking off ln. woke up to my hand in my pants and my cat crawling all over me
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