ask me if i forgot to go to a midterm today
I think i'm just gonna start shot-gunning everything that comes in can form.
Just called my mom. She definitely saw all those fb statuses so thanks for that.
Haha did she know what fisting meant?
Yeah. Which is upsetting in itself
Don't tell me wow. Tell me this is normal for college and in no way am I a whore.
I forgot to tell you thank you for putting me out when I was on fire. im sure I'll laught about this someday...
Well, at least he doesn't refer to you as his associate. his mattress associate
Are you available to help carry me into the house Monday?
I am literally sitting on the toilet in utter disbelieve that last night even happened. My god that was only Monday.
Just made out with a girl I dated in high school, and she told me her girlfriend likes me. I like where this is going.
Tell me about it. Running across highways take alot outta ya. When he found out, he was all "concerned" about it.
how do you ask an olympian for your underwear back?
I don't know if we can compare high school reunions anymore. The keg stands started before 7.
went out last night. woke up with a lisp.
i woke up this morning wearing my pants as a scarf and my shirt as a daiper, my boyfriends contact name in my phone is "human sacrifice" and yours is "i like eggs"....can someone please tell me what happened last night
the guy had "bad bitches only" tattooed above his penis...
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