dude sorry but u no that when a guys 'likes' ur pic on facebook it only means he was just jacking off to it.
I want a meaningful relationship and i wont get one if i keep giving him blow jobs in my basement while watching family guy.
He tried to carry her to her room after she passed out, but when he picked her up she came back to, saw him, screamed rape and pulled out her vuvuzela app and blasting it like a rape whistle.
Oh I forgot to tell u. I hit someone with my car in the RiteAid parking lot. More like a nudge.
Being the adderall dealer on campus, I feel responsible for everyone graduating.
You know summer is almost over when ur school booty calls start hitting u up as if solidifying their spot in drunken mistakes for next semester
All i know if I'm throwing uo into a bag with a smiley facE on it right now and this is not a smileuy face time right nowe
dude, my ass and shoulder hurt from that kayak last night... note to self: wood planks holding kayak from ceiling do not also hold up a human being
Yeah...don't think he was sober. He kept screaming "I fucking love this game!". It was his Chase app.
Will you trust fall hold me, so I can pee of this building.
I'm also sorry that I ate your chicken sandwich while you were throwing up....
He told me I was "too flexible." Excuse me?
Holy shit, I wanna ride him into the horizon.
Cant leave im designed bacon maker you come here
Question: When you have the names of 4 guys tattoo'd on you, how do you make the 5th one real special?
Randomize