We need to have an Itty-Bitty Titty Committee mtg somewhere in the range of 5 minutes to ASAP.
i don't remember but I assumed it was bad when I woke up with directions from his house to mine already pulled up on my phone
Moral of the story: don't get pregs or your chances in the beer league are over
We're learning about the color wheel. Hello college.
It's not that drunk me is smarter; it's that sober me is secretly playing for the other team.
There's an official council for his ex boyfriends. They told me they 'look forward to the day I join them'.
Oh my god please beg your father to turn the car around so you can possibly get laid by a knight at medieval times.
I seriously think my heart may fail. And I didn't even grab a toilet beer :(
Were going to have to vacuum the bathtub, great party
Oh my God, that is a gorgeous man. And I wasn't even gay until five minutes ago.
I had to physically pry the rocks out of your hands so you wouldn't throw them at the guy with the cowboy hat. You probably would've missed anyways.
He was dressed up as Jesus and had vodka in one hand while he was blessing everyone and splashing them with holy water in the bathroom.
I would have been the big man on campus...just flop my wang out on the table and how them what they were gonna deal with if they dropped the soap
Woohoo! Instead of a pregnancy test you can buy me a burrito
OH MY GOD REMEMBER ALL THAT I LOVE NEW YORK I DVRED BECAUSE I JUST DID
Randomize
