im officially scared..,i finally realized who my boyfriend reminds me of! spencer pratt
you're the one who masterbates every night to the titanic soundtrack
she said "lets play dickbreaker!" and then threw my blackberry at my dick as hard as she could.
his grandma walked in on us. twice. and he was truly fucking surprised when i put my pants back on.
Nice. Don't spend your therapist's co-pay on Jaeger bombs.
he said i balance and complete him. i feel sick
I can't find my underwear or one of my shoes but he baked me cookies for breakfast.
Thanks for letting me use your ID, there's $120 along with your ID in the mail to cover the Urinating in public fine I got last night....sorry
I don't even fuck like that, he just happened to be in the right place at the right drunk.
Is her birthday actually on cinco de mayo? That makes so much sense
She knew the head wasn't all that so she gave me her taco. I'm will in to give her a second chance.
I LACK THE NECESSARY BRAIN FUNCTIONS TO BE ABLE TO PROPERLY RESPOND TO THAT
You're like the Miss Manners of anonymous gay sex.
I think my FWB just broke up with me and i don't know how I feel about that
I just landed at Logan and some guy threw up in the baggage carousel. Boston never really changes
Randomize