Stoned at DSW. SO MANY SHOES! THEY'RE FREAKING ME OUT.
So you really shouldn't go around telling people you're fireproof
I just beat off to a cartoon porn video. what has my life come to
Does it really count as two different guys if they're brothers? I like to think of it as one and a half.
whoever threw up in my shampooo bottle is totally getting defriended on facebook.
i tried to stop you. you just kept saying your split ends needed punishment.
Who's got a bloodstream full of margaritas by 2pm? Not you, that's for sure, because you've got one of those "real" jobs.
Yes, I am about to pass out on my beanbag with a mason jar of wine. Welcome to the south freshmen.
Human Centipede: The Drinking Game. This is non-negotiable. First one to pass out the rest of us get to FEEEEED THEM!
sorry for the naked aussie man in your room last night, he got lost on his way to the bathroom
I remember doing shots of gin, then I have this strange memory of us making out in the womens room at waffle house.
I regret none of it.
when I woke up, he was drunk and singing "soft kitty" and petting my face
Oh man, are we repeating last 4th of July?!
That shouldn't even be a question, it's a tradition now. Hope your manhood is ready.
I have no idea what those words in that order meant, but if you go to Florida send me pics of strippers
it was a 'fall asleep on the bathroom floor after puking bc the cold tile is legit more comfortable than your bed' kind of night.
He answered the door stark naked. When I called him on it he shrugged and said 'casual Friday ' Some boys can't be trusted to work from home.
Randomize
