If it makes you feel any better I'm plucking my mustahce and drinking. Alone.
laying in bed listening to christian music, jealous of the hope they have for their life. also need to beat off, can i think about you?
Well, emily woke up in Hoboken, cati woke up in jersey city, and i woke up in brooklyn....and our hotel room we rented in the city remained empty. Best birthday yet.
Thats cool. we found a cat INSIDE a coke machine.
what the fuck. my fiance told me she called our wedding band last night and told them to perform "best i ever had" for our first dance
just woke up to two already rolled blunts and a full explanation of what happened last night. I love my gf
Motor boating, judging by the amount of lipstick I found I would say between 6 to 8 times
We had break up sex twice. He said one was cause he had to say goodbye to both tits.
Yes, but if I hadn't gotten here early, I never would have seen the butch lesbian midget waddling down stairs from the bar. Worth every minute of drinking alone.
Smuggling a beer bottle full of vodka out of the bar with a tampon as a plug for the top of the bottle wasn't one of my classiest ideas... but your hangover proves it was resourceful and effective. Your welcome.
We see some guy emerge from the forest on the island this morning, alone, in only a snuggie. Morning shots and bagels on us for the number one walk of shame.
I just made cupcakes.... Vodka icing. Results in the morning.
Ask him to get me chedder bratwurst instead of the molly
Unless if you guys already left. Then I want the molly
I guess "Ass Fun Friday" is not a thing no matter how many times I say it or bring it up in conversation...
if they didn't want us to do blow at uni, why would they make textbooks so smooth?
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