You can't wash away shame.
I can try.
dude i woke up to 20 missed calls from you, 3 from a blocked number and had 13 voicemails that all said "send me a picture of your tits."
so im guessing thats a no.....
I wasn't fucked. I was just drunk, because i was still able to walk into the woods and masterbate.
We started hooking up and a group of freshmen outside my window started chanting my name. Encouraging yet distracting
its family weekend so i'm givin my little bro a tour of everywhere ive thrown up on campus
Its a Guy he gets weed for. I'm kinda confused as to why there are going to even be tuxedos involved at all.
Thanks for having me and my emotional baggage over last night.
I can't wait till we are old and wrinkly and I can turn to you and ask, "Remember when you Rick Jamesed the shit out of that couch??"
Relaxed was like phase 1 of this phase 7 high
Some old bald man is a 100,000 dollar Audi sports car just revved his engine at me and held out his phone at me trying to get my number. I hate the valley.
I was so drunk last night I couldn't see faces, only from the shoulders down.
His dad and I had a drunk conversation about life. At 4 am he told me that I was 21 and cute and should fuck whoever I want.
Just almost drowned myself in the shower again. I need an adult.
i just called dibs on the taxi driver at the bar that isnt drinking. im a grown up
We were all having a bath, the three of us, then that drug dealer guy walked in and peed. Sitting down. Apparently he didn't want to offend us.
Randomize
