Her problem is just that he inner beauty is just as ugly as her physical beauty
There is a pube in my fucking eyeball
Her boyfriend was wrestling another girl. But, she said she was okay with it because she kept checking for boners--w the back of her hand like she was checking for a fever
I think you can do her, she seemed pretty set for revenge the second time her boyfrind high fives her in the face.
Looking for things to spread butter on. Found men's briefs in garbage can. Lost insurance card. Summer has finally arrived
I think I may be stoned foreverrrrrrrrr. The earth has been around for a long time.
I screamed so bad because I thought he was going for my sandwich forgetting it was in my hand
Just told some little girl not to judge me as I brushed my teeth in the target bathroom
Sockward: that moment during sexytimes when you realize your socks are still on and you have no idea how to remove them in a non-awkward fashion.
I was proudly and successfully the first girl ever to get kicked out of a the bar for being too drunk last night. Loving spring break.
So yes we had an orgy last night and I sucked your tits while you fucked my husband but I am weird about sharing my toothbrush.
I'm the only person I know who could have actual sex and then dream about my vibrator.
Cocaine is ok on a cleanse, right?
My night has consisted of googling cat penises and creating a Tinder profile.
Our house drank 90 beers yesterday afternoon before 8pm so add that to the list
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