He started to lick my mole,thinking it was my nipple.
cant go down on her man, her vagoo reminds me of a face hugger from aliens
I ate one of your animal crackers. just one. ok four. but no frosting. ok frosting.
I think need to divide my DVD collection into "movies I've seen" and "movies I've only seen during sex"
I was fucking the girl and her best friend walked in on us. She said we looked thirsty, got us a glass of water, and poured it down both of our throats. It was like... sex bottle service
Don't talk about his dick. That's mine. There's a copyright on it. Use with permission
I packed spaghetti and rum. But panties? Nah
Look man, sometimes you just gotta say "Sure! Why not? I can always take a shower afterwards"
He looks like a fat version of lurch from the adams family and smells like fritos. This is not the caliber man I want pleasuring himself to the thought of me!
There's a drag queen here that reminds me strongly of you. You should try crossdressing.
Just ate a chocolate chip cookie upside down. This is what having a degree does for you.
Hey Kellie. Me putting. My face intebetaeen ut your boobs made my night
You proceeded to get into a playground school bus and yell "all aboard to Margaritaville!"
the guy working the counter at the liquor store noticed i got my haircut and said it was pretty.....
A friendship for the ages born on how horny we both are
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