the only reason I knew his name is because half way through I looked up and it was tatooed on his chest.
a cemetary is a place for people to rest in peace and you just spermed all over their land
we need to stop having unprotected sex.
ya i know. we're like the secret life of the american whores.
I only have two new blunt burns this year as opposed to freshman year's 6. This is growing up.
She said her tits were too big, and he slapped her. He said that Jesus didn't appreciate bitches that fish for compliments
I just got my inseam measured in raffle tickets by a drag queen. Being fondled for charity is awesome.
Puked in my laptop case in the middle of my nutrition class.
If i spent $300 & took that thing home i would hate myself today.
Ifound a recepit for a hotel room in my sock. soo.. Ithink thats where my dog is.
Since i didn't have a condom I told him to use jump ship method, I think I was overly invested in my sailor costume this year.
I guess I made wings because there's chicken everywhere. Even on the walls. 3 of them. It's like a chicken grave yard.
Also, am I the only one who noticed he didn't fuck you until after you were technically a cripple? Or am I reading into this too much? Congrats on that btw
She fell asleep with me.... We found her pantsless in the dogbed in the morning... Russian foreign exchange students
McDonald's and a car nap. I feel kinda human
Cheyanne in woods. Ducks attacked. My toe is bleeding. We are gpsing our way home on foot. No worries
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