My vagina is so ashamed right now. It won't even look at me.
Superbowl + Mdma, hope we're on the same page.
Their bromance is so intense that they don't even eye-fuck when they see each other....they eye-make-love.
She took a break from repeating "my face is still buzzing!" to say that the phantom of the opera could be here
He bought me shots at the bar as his way of of paying me back for Plan B
I can't believe I cried over a sausage mcmuffin.
P.S. The slutty NASCAR driver costume will be saved and used year round for role play.
It looks like sephora exploded on his dick, so i assumed I was the second girl that gave him head that night.
Someday you'll be stoned enough to create a one-person step team and then you'll understand
Trust me that one dick you don't want. It's like a whale... That's swam too many oceans...
No. I either had a 6 minute orgasm or I had so many I lost count. I'm still not sure.
He was "hot guy in the dark". One of us had to sleep with him. I took the bullet you're welcome.
Turns out the guy I did all that coke with the other night is a cop
We're dating now
We were dancing and then he pointed to the club floor and there was money that I dropped everywhere. That was the nicest thing someone has ever done for me.
I jerked off 12 hours ago exactly. I owe it to my penis to get laid.
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