Tell him ill love him long time
I'll assure him of it
Yes because finding a guy to give head to is pretty difficult.
I mean not really
Obviously that's why it was a joke you are so stupid it's impossible.
i was having this nice romantic moment with my girlfriend. then jimmy came in and peed on the fridge
So about class tomorrow..... i,ll be there. But I may be still a bit drink and wearing a suit. I'll explain when I get there.
It's only 4 pm and I'm already way past my preferred quota of "could have died" moments
Too many sundays start with me waking up still drunk in my car.
Dude I woke up in her bed wearing a top hat and bunny slippers and noticed one of us had pissed in bed. The last thing I wanted to ask for was a ride home
You woke me up at 2 am to tell me I could pee in a golf club if I wanted to.
Late night whataburger runs are great, except if you're the one that gets left black out drunk puking in the backyard drinking from the water hose
They gave me patron and potatoes I couldn't say no
Did I fall on/off the boat yesterday? Cuz my right leg looks and feels like if it got hit by shrapnel.
Well you should have thought of that before you were reckless with your butt
Saying I've had more balls in my mouth than you is the last clear, coherent thing I remember.
Woohoo! Instead of a pregnancy test you can buy me a burrito
PSA Do not blow dry your junk.
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