In line at the arbys drive thru on foot. Legendary.
All I know is that if a letter starts with "I'm aware you jerked off in the bathroom last night," I don't want to finish reading it.
She called picking up at 2pm a matinee drug deal.
Have you ever chugged beers in the hospital parking garage with your mom?
Just walked into the bar to find a guy in a Boba Fett helmet leaning casually against the wall, texting. This night just got real.
All I've succeeded in doing since I saw you is drool on my shoulder
Kripsy Kremes at our place, bring your own coffee. And your own donuts because these ones are ours.
brushed my teeth nine times since getting home, still afraid there are pubes hiding in between my molars. fucking gummy bears
but real talk, he made 1 phone call last night and had someone bring us tacos at 3am so idk I might be inlove
Hey I consider Sunday's trip to the ER a success. You're alive and now you know for sure you're not pregnant. I got my highest ever Tetris score. Wins all around.
I will consider it. I need to determine if ogling him is worth almost certain death via zipline.
either he just commented on my nose ring or he's offering me cocaine, I honestly can't tell
Just for the record, I did not have sex in your bed. Happy 4th of July.
The girl at the liquor store remembered me as "the girl who pays in hundreds" so she didn't ID me
Last time i cooked this high i tried to makw bacon amd then burned myselfbon the grill, only to realize 25min latwr when the bacon wouldnt cook that the grill wasn't on. I IMAGINED the burn.
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