Somerville?? What the hell are you going to do there?
Watch a movie and have sloppy make outs OBVI. 45 Harris St. in case I die.
What do you say about some mid-afternoon anal?
i saw a stretcher and literally ran around for 10 minutes telling people it wasnt for me
i dont even feel safe using a push mower...that hungover
Last night you were talking while puking saying, "ahh the shoes and the purse, I'm gonna have to wash those"
Don't blame the cocaine for your eating disorder.
Im not moving so it's going to have to be a 3 some.
It's not that drunk me is smarter; it's that sober me is secretly playing for the other team.
how is telling me how long you drunkenly fucked someone supposed to make me miss you?
I never should have let my cousin and his pregnant girlfriend move in with me. I'm never having sex again. They scare off men more than 'my dream wedding' pin board.
he has this weird thing where he watches me pee
I asked for my Beats earbuds back and he sent me a pic of them tied around his penis. Now I miss both my great ear buds and his great dick
im sleeping with a therapist...so you can talk to me.
New Orleans is just like you. Dirty but beautiful and will always have a special place in my heart
Oh, and Harry Potter. We could be fuck-and-Harry-Potter buddies.
Randomize
