I want leopard sheets
haha sexcapades
thats the plan
I'm not really sure actually. until I fell in love with a boy (which was just a few weeks ago) I thought my attraction to men was purely physical.
so you were gay...and then you realized you were EVEN MORE gay
just got a girls number while on a 5 am adderall cig break this is college at its finest
I just found a 2 minute video on my phone of you throwing up in a fake plant.
Weirdest sensation ever: having your penis fall asleep. It was like tiny hulk hogan was choking it out
I know more about this girls vagina than I know about her personality
Do you remember doing synchronized hip thrusts to Michael Jackson? Probably one of my favorite parts of the night
I thought adderall would sober me up, but it did NOT.
Damn, well, it could always be worse
For sure, I could be a prison bitch right now. Thursdays aren't half bad
I just found a piece of squished oatmeal cream pie in my armpit. So very sad.
There is nothing worse then the feeling after you've held in farts all night..
What's his name?
He was so fat that he broke two of my ribs
Maybe it's time to stop screaming I'm a chubby chaser every time you enter a drinking establishment
If he refers to me as slump buster one more fucking time.
On a brighter more disgusting note...... I think I just shart myself but I'm too afraid to find out.
We were fucking in the bedroom then we heard Sports center on in the living room. He stopped midfuck when I started celebrating that my team won over his
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