Do you think most people who work at an airport Chili's can pin point where their lives went wrong?
they described our state of being as looking similar to a crime scene....you were on the ground and i was running around screaming.
In case any of you were wondering, kyle is alive. He also intends to do the same thing tommorow night and the night after.Goodnight everyone
Were at her birthday dinner and her dad keeps buying me shots saying when I was your age I fucked the shit outta girls
Hahahahahaha remind him your dating his daughter
I saw you sitting on top of my car trying to row back home... Did you make it?
Buying weed with grant money. God I love college. No other time are we presented with these opportunities.
It's like I'm snorkeling in an ocean of tequila.
The cops busted down the door and everyone ran. I was just trying to find my shirt before I got arrested
STDs are my biggest fear, besides whales. They're so fucking big.
Chipotle just hit me... I want to go sit in the corner of the shower and cry until morning.
Would you still love me if my nipple fell off?
Only ESPN could find the two ugly girls from a school in Florida
I just want someone to put their head on my boobs and laugh at my jokes ....
Saw the guy I once slept with, he was buying Beer and shit tone of diapers. Glad to see how 2016 will turn out.
I can't really feel a difference, so essentially I paid 60 bucks to bedazzle my vag.
Randomize