i just made out with my boyfriends father...and so did jess
Dude, she's so old there's a chalk outline where her reproductive organs used to be.
Car fucking is for special occasions like birthdays and bank holidays. Don't want to lose the magic by making it an everyday thing.
I hate fucking guys that don't drink coffee. My morning hangover and shame will not be cured by your stupid tea.
I just woke up my dad to tell him that i made out with the drummer. He wasnt as excited as I was.
Not a chance. She stuck her hand under my kilt and she told the whole table I was indeed commando. She broke all the rules.
I don't know what to be prouder of: the fact that last night i was able to successfully find my way home from evanston with 3-d glasses on, or that i was able to make my way around my house in the dark with my pants around my ankles
They made out. Sounded like hippos drinking water
He came so hard he burst a blood vessel in his eye. Do I have to take him to the ER? because I'm too tired for this shit.
He pulled a bucket of fried chicken out of his backpack as a peace offering. Under the chicken was a rainbow bag of weed. We're dating again.
Well yes he stayed. He brought Guiness, them he shaved me. It's a long, but beautiful story.
He told me"I think your ready for this" and went into his closet whipped out a movie certiffied light saber.
They made the paper for stealing gnomes. I fucked a local celebrity.
That sounds good. I'd totally blow you somewhere quick but im not in the frame of mind to think of a place
Be outside in 5
First time not coming to this class high in a month and a half, never again will i put myself thru this torture
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