You can't special order awesome
I gained confidence after I found out she was a lesbian. At least that way I could flirt with her and convince her to buy me taco bell after the bar
No need to get angry I'm just tryin to get my door back
Just bought koolaid for my vodka in a DARE shirt with my NES wallet. I'm everything I thought I'd be when I was 8.
Except even better, boobs get discounts.
You almost set me on fire last night.
You probably deserved it.
And for some reason I just want to have sex with EVERYTHING
Being with her was like shitty sexual fear factor big ass sausage nipples over sized outty belly button i was scared and drunk tell know one
Chris used to fill up a Camel Back for thirsty Thursday. God I really miss him, do you remember when he gets out of jail?
He gave me the award for most entertaining blow job. That should count for something.
Pizza and koolaid didn't even make me feel better. This hangover means business
You know you went through something intense when you actuallu applaud yourself for not shitting your pants
Because bro, I don't want your dick being touched mid conversation.
I'm pretty sure our sex is better than most foods and that says a lot too bc I really like food
All you need for a happy life is Jameson and slippers
His balls will have been in my mouth at least once by this time tomorrow.
Randomize
