if i had a dollar for every time ive had to piece a night together like they did in "the hangover", i bet i could outsell their weekend box office earnings...
question - sack: should she or should she not play with it during foreplay?
i just found a bag of weed behind my capital one card. i guess that's what's in my wallet.
Whenever I said your name you screamed polo and did another shot.
My grandma paid her handyman in pain killers. I now know why this is in my genes
I puked in the pool and didn't tell them, then they all went swimming. Is it dick to just sit back and enjoy the show?
It's going to be great. We're a perfect team to break up marriages and happiness.
Note to self: do not take so many shots that you sit on the floor under the bar where nobody can see you, and reach out and grab peoples crotch.
Ya but I plan to getting arrested more towards the end of summer
Finding a keg in our kitchen would be like god personally high fiving each of us.
Yeah. I had to take off my shirt. It's soaked in weakness.
My 19 year old brother just hooked up with his 45 year old cougar kindergarten teacher. These sorts of situations make me realize why the sorority girls call him Wondercock
I lost half a toenail and didn't realize it. Bloody shoe shoulda been a clue.
It's getting harder and harder to find People to carry her home
She shouldn't drink
So the doorbell rang while we were banging, and I'm pretty sure the pizza man saw my dick. But hey, we got pizza.
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