there was a trapeze. enough said
i was concerned for your health after you took your "last shot" four times...
why is there cat hair all over my deoderant?
she wanted to smell more freshershest than you.
He said he loved me so I pretended not to hear it because I don't think "I love your penis" was the response he was looking for.
Our penis' have led to more networking than mark zuckerberg.
IT'S SUMMA TIME
ITS SUMMA TIME NOT BE HIGH ALL THE TIME TIME
THEY'RE THE SAME THING
The point remains that this is the setup for some great stories
Or terrible, horrifying, traumatic experiences
great clearly means different things to us
Well, you've continued the theme of living with people who's dicks I've sucked.
I told him I tried to eat a stranger's sandwich while I was drunk. Mildly disappointed but he realizes he has me for a kid.
A gay dude just spanked me with a nicholas sparks novel and called me foxy. I'm putting this on my resume.
Just got to Evans to buy weed. His mom showed up unannounced. Now the three of us are chillen. Super.
fucked a girl in the dry storage closet at work. knocked over a whole rack of tomato paste and pinto beans. and also i really hope my manager doesn't review this footage from the security camera
this temple that is my body is starting to crumble and turn into ruins
I can't say too many people would say watching their drunk best friends fuck in a hot tub is very normal.
I don't want to hook up with him sober. That's pretty much like saying I love you.
Randomize
