Where were you when I was single???
Still in diapers.
I figure if he loans me money i only owe him sex for the rest of the summer before i pay him back, right?
I wonder who the first pervert was, and if he would be proud of me for advancing his art form by so much
He looks like he has a penis
What the fuck
A good one, a good penis
He crawled in my bed this morning, ate me out, and even brought me a panera deli sammie for lunch at school. I don't care what he lied about, all is forgiven him.
Im not moving so it's going to have to be a 3 some.
He threw up. He never throws up. It was like finding out superman cant fly anymore. I was so sad for him.
On an unrelated note, i found out who duct taped shoelaces to my face
you have no idea the dirty thing i want to do to your blad spot. please wear my vagina as a hat.
I think we need to teach you what straight means again
Know what's awkward? Having a couple of moving guys watch while you detach the bondage cuffs from your bedframe, that's what.
She was on top, but I lost her at "alright, you look like predator."
I just saw your mom take a body shot off an undergrad, please tell me you're somewhere near by.
She made me baby bird juul smoke to her while we were fucking
Angels sing when his face is between my thighs. I came 3 times before he even came up for air.
Randomize
