I don't know what you were told but i for sure didn't sleep with any one but steve's couch.
ok so the lil girl sitting behind u was picking the hairs off ur sisters back and putting them in her mouth
True Life: I hate vaginal excretions
Yes, that's a picture of my balls. It isn't however an answer to my question.
The guy that just projectile vomited over the balcony is now going down to find the pill he just puked up. He said he wasn't about to waste $15.
We had to leave the bar because you were trying to show the bartender your boobs for water.
isn't that the guy who always buys you drinks?
yeah. i love a man who still buys me drinks after the bar cuts me off.
next time on intervention
On a lighter note, my mom and I were playing scattergories, and for "things that you keep hidden" we both put dildo. Proof that we really are related.
I remember halftime. Then I woke up in Spain. I need a drink in order to process this.
you know it's a good party when the fucking floor caves in. THE FUCKING FLOOR.
Nothing says love like couples STD testing
Nothing says breakup like the results
I woke up last night a kitchen floor with my shirt off and I love America written on my leg in eye liner
I sang Sweet Caroline with a homeless man and made him 25 bucks. Redbull vodka gives you wings!
He tried to do the do on me last night and my exact words were "stay away from my princess parts. they're renovating."
If he doesn't fuck you on the 4th of July, he doesn't really love this country.
Randomize