this is a family affair. You're an embarrassment.
whatever it's not my family
So I'm banging this nun...
Isn't that how all good stories start? I like it already...
He told me he was ok to drive home. Then I found him face-planted in the parking lot.
I found your bra. How you get it off the satellite dish is your problem.
I should not be in class today. For the professors sake.
I can't even look at my running shoes. I swear I drank more in the last 2 days than the last 6 months combined
I figured out why her friends always say g is for god when she leaves with someone. She wears a double g cup bra
I'd do them all but honestly I'm so high that I probably should have a chaperone.
Like I want to yell at him for pissing on my floor but there's still a chance its my pee....
is it acceptable to cross the border for sex?
almost just sent your mom a dick pic. almost.
I don't know man. She said my cock made her promises my heart couldn't fulfill.
Honestly the prospect of dick really lifts a girl's spirits
I'm sitting naked on my bathroom floor and it remind me of us.
That's my way of saying I miss you
You told me you didn't want to go to the hospital because you were drunk, but because you didn't want to leave the "fun".
Randomize
