It doesn't have to be a walk of shame...just pretend he took you to breakfast.
No one shows this much boob at breakfast
I'll have you know...trying to masturbate while a song about jesus is stuck in your head is next to impossible
Then you jumped off your bed with your arms outstretched, yelled "I'm Goliath, watch out New York!" and then began singing the Gargoyles theme song as you 'soared' around your room.
Don't be ridiculous, the Gargoyles theme song has no words. How could I sing that mess?
You just started going "da da da da da! da da da da da! DA DA!!" then going "swoosh" as you glided about.
Based on how hungover I feel today, it makes more sense that the bouncer didn't let me in to that bar.
i'm not accepting baked goods from anyone for awhile. especially after the stalker pie.
Turns out puking in your mask makes it even harder to see out of the mask..
It was like stroking your vagina with a cloud.
I drew a nude short fat middle aged woman today and liked it
It was honestly one of my favorite days in art class except for the 20 min she faced me and kept looking at me and we made eye contact
Idk but she keeps giving me s'mores and I'm having a hard time caring about her alcoholism because of it
I just sneezed and margarita mix and ash came out of my nose. I love jersey
Just took a shot of 151, rimmned my middle finger in it, lit it on fire and lit a cigarette off it while flicking off my boss. How was your night??
The sex was totally worth how awkward its gonna be for the next few weeks
I found out he hated a girl that I hate so I fucked him. My reasons for fucking guys are getting bad.
I screamed "You look like a guy I've fucked!" to your brother at a party... I have some explaining to do.
Shit. My boss is having me meet and greet with the new doc upstairs. Do you think his doctor powers will detect that I'm still high?
Randomize
