I reminded them that I didn't puke and I cleaned yours up! So huh!
After she swallowed she let out a hurge burp. No BS. I'm the cock of the walk.
I think you have the wrong number. But at any rate, respect.
The dutch village is so much worse hungover. Fuck them and their wooden shoes.
i found your underwear in my bra... i dont even remember how this happened.
shit. all i remember is the look on your moms face.
I cannot stress to you how much better your current situation is than listening to gay sex
I'm more concerned as to why he has a playlist entitled Dem Club Beats.
Puked on a Tom Jones impersonator on the strip
She looked at my cock with a kind of resigned disappointment.
my dad just paid them in porn...i no longer feel guilty for getting hammered and not helping
I dont know what we smoked last night but I woke up and found out I started writing a book called White Trash Princess. Its the best thing Ive ever read
Moonshine marathon is never a good idea
I made out with drunk Joe Dirt and then put his mullet wig on for him. True Halloween romance.
Ur wingman ability is causing serious doubt
Ok first off its WAY easier if you are actually here
The cat just walked up and made eye contact with me while I had sex. I'm going to have to burn the house down with him in it.
I do not mind being torn from the first touches of sleep to see a man who looks like that
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