i could't wear that belt anymore, it was gonna make me keep shitting for the rest of the night
you stole their roomba and ran out the door so that you could 'set it free'.
we found you passed out on lawn and the roomba bouncing back and forth on the sidewalk.
I thought his dick was headless. then I pulled back the foreskin.
shes still asleep dad put a lobster in her bathroom
i remember you telling me to take a shower, brush my teeth, go get back in bed w her, and "just do what i was born to do." and as soon as i stopped yacking i did just that. you saved my birthday.
I guess it was to be expected that I was put on somebody's list called penis socket.
It'll be like a meth lab. But with jello.
Whatever you gave me is making me lactate
I am too drunk to deal with your everything. Reread this everytime you feel the need to talk to me.
She was moaning so loud as i walked out of the room her roommates gave me a standing ovation... i think they are next
WHY DOES HE HAVE TO CALL WHEN I'M MASTURBATING?! This time I'm really pissed. It's like he knows he's depriving me of orgasms.
I asked him to explain what he meant by "hooking up" in paragraph form
So... In conclusion, do I bring my vibrator and risk not only having it getting taken out at security, but also exposing my dad to my neon green vibrator, or just leave it here?
Be safe. If you have intercourse with a boy use so many condoms this his penis is no longer recognizable.
I realize ur driving andwont read this til u stop, but I'm sleeping in the bed of the pickup. Please don't hit a deer.
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