He saved me in his phone as Easy Jen. Should I be offended?
I wouldn't worry about it. He has me as "Sex Puppet."
some old guy just shit himself in my section. everyones leaving
Just threw up in airport security. Happy holidays.
Oh and apparently TSA has to open your present from my family or the terrorists win
She was blacklisted from the Uhaul center...what the fuck do you have to do to get blacklisted from a Uhaul center
I need someone to meet me at the end of the road and throw captain morgan at my face like they do with water at marathons
he was definitely TRYING to give me herpes.
I feel like a monkey keeps fucking me in the ear with a trombone as a dick.
Faking my way through an entire party as a British exchange student. Wish me luck.
You kept yelling in my face " YOU'RE GONNA HAVE TO SUCK A DICK TONIGHT!"
That's what you get for dating construction workers you meet in tunnels.
Dude that chick had a dog in her car. Like when she goes bar hoping so does roofus. He gaurds the car.
So how did it go?
I'm not sure if it was all the eggnog or all the alcohol, but hosting an eggnog pong tournament was a mistake.
I got your flops too. But yeah you rolled off your raft a bunch of times so we had to ask the white trash squad to help you back on. You bit one of them
I would date him. For 1 month. Just so I could say I was a trap queen for 1 month.
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