is it a bad sign that i now think of my run-ins with cops as "skill building seminars"?
um, yeah. i think it is.
he shaved USA in his pubs
To think... Somewhere, too drunk by buckcherry is someone's theme song
She said she couldnt do it today but shed make it up to me next week
stick it in her butt and if she asks, say that thats what you thought she meant
I hope whoever gets these locks of love doesn't have a drug test anytime soon
As payment for all the times you have babysat me while im drunk, im giving you the shorts i stole from the guy i stayed with on friday night. They're clean. Come get em.
He cheated on me in real life. I can cheat at words with friends.
Me too. We could do it like prostitutes. No kissing on the mouth.
New hot neighbor boys moving in across from us...So i did the logical thing and bought two 30 packs up the hill and walked right by em. Consider the line hooked and ready to reel.
Usually I just ask myself "have I been naked here?" If the answer is no I correct the situation.
He asked me if I remembered touching his police badge. awk.
But there's never enough margarita money.
This is going to be one of those situations where we lose a day, isn't it
Just text him and be like do you want this pussy or not. You have three seconds to respond.
Note to self, the correct response when a guy tells you he likes you as a person is not "ew"
Would an open wound count as good sex or bad sex?
Randomize
