now i know why they say having sex with her is the equivalent to licking a pay phone
i'm at a party where swedish girls are dumping laundry detergent on each other because it glows in blacklight. this is awesome
Someone left a shot of disaronno in a champagne glass here this morning... flip a coin?
His whole family saw that I had cum in my hair once they turned on the blacklight at the bowling alley. You should have seen his mother's face.
Just croosed over that too drunk for chemistry class line
i'm not a hellocoptur, but youer in a dorm ans im un a dorm
Just took 4 secret shots in his bathroom to not remember him naked.
His thanks his mom for not having an abortion at his wedding toast. I love frat weddings.
he's dressed up as pikachu 3 fucking years in a row and gotten laid each time. i don't understand
Don't get me wrong, I love talking about lube and such, but why are we?
DICK PUNCH EXTRAVAGANZAAAAAA!!!!!
I think it's awesome that you're getting shower sex advice from a Mormon.
I put my hydrocodone prescription in my cereal box its like real lucky charms
I apparently made a "health and fitness" subcatagory called "drugs" on mint at some point. I used it to catagorize all of my nyc atm withdrawls for $60 haha
I'm on a walk of shame carrying YOUR pants. You owe me.
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