So it's 10:55am and I just woke up on the floor in the hallway on the4th floor. There should probably be no moredrinking competetions.
i convinced her that her period would come back if we did it doggy style
In reality u ask do u have beer at your house but what your really saying is will there be cock in my mouth
this weekend destroyed me...my brain feels like the curly fry at the bottom of the bag. GAhhh come save me
that's ecstasy for ya. now I'm kinda in the mood for jack in the box.
Wow. A quad shot of peppermint schnapps. I feel like I just deep throated a candy cane. Best 21st ever.
More or less binge drinking as a giant grape seemed justified
My pubes were yanked out by the root when they got caught in the condom. I think it's time for a bikini wax.
Tell me about it. Running across highways take alot outta ya. When he found out, he was all "concerned" about it.
You should be glad you didn't come with last night. I watched pirate porn for the first time in my life as the 9th wheel.
She looks like a beluga.
I want to splash her with water and when she screams say "I didn't want you to die. You looked parched"
There is not enough whiskey in the world to get me through what happened on Pretty Little Liars tonight.
First world problems.
he was high. i was rolling face. we were both wearing grateful dead t shirts. at that point it's like we had no choice but to fuck
I mean my dick does have feeling again, which is a step in the right direction
I lost my pants last night, she told me I walked into their room after leaving 5 minutes before wearing my thong.....and no pants. I have absolutely no idea where I left them.
I'm officially removing you from my nudes recipient list on snapchat.
Randomize