dude, wtf is with her now? she has stuff up about how i am kicking her while she's down
wtf? who are you bitching about me to now?
so I finished the entire bottle...next thing I know, it's 8 am and I wake up on the fucking beach in the low tide with a family standing about 30 feet from me just staring.
So, I had a dream last night that girls approached guys at the bar and said things like "i would like to pleasure you tonight." No drink buying, no sweet talking or ANYTHING.....it. was. awesome.
the australian girl literally just drank an entire pitcher of beer in about twenty seconds. i want to go to there.
I'm gonna have to fantasize about her dying just to get off.
Do not buy whiskey under any circumstances. There should be a UN sanctioned buffer zone between me and Seagrams.
Remember when there was a happier time when people could all hang out together with out the awkwardness of the fact that she stole $1000 and cheated on a brother with another brother !?!??
The bouncer was just about to kick Sarah out for getting with this guy 'too physically'. I told him that was 'her style' and he let them stay. Banter.
Thanks to that wedding, I got to use the term "finger bang" more than I have since high school.
Monday funday. I brushed my teeth with antibacterial soap. hangover I did not have.
all night she kept rolling over and mumbling something about wanting an extendable retractable urethra.
Lost my pants last night. Really need to stop taking shots of whiskey like I'm eating skittles.
They kept freaking out that you were missing and potentially having sex.. like it was a bad thing. Got fed up with hearing it so i just yelled "ITS HER BIRTHDAY AND SHE CAN FUCK IF SHE WANTS TO!" They gave me unnecessary looks. I thought it was acceptable.
I saw his new girlfriend. She was flashing people, short and kinda chubby. I was happy with my life after that.
I really wanna treat my body good. Because i plan on doing drugs
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