I swear she didn't look like that last week.
Did your girl go home? Did she have fun? Can we have our friend back?
She made the grapes disappear! ALL OF THEM!!!
Currently having a discussion about how bad cheating is with the girl im dating and the girl im fucking. This might be a sign that i need to reassess my life
Me too. I'd like to spend all next summer high and drunk and riding ponies and boys.
can your parents tell?
i just had a cookie in one hand and a phone in the other and tried to eat my phone...they know
my new ipod has external speakers and a video camera...all i can think about is how much more convenient it would be for me to make a pretty decent sex tape
I knew the night had taken a turn when we showed up and our flabongo was being chilled in the freezer.
nope, if she's going to skank it up with ginge-a-saurus douche she deserves the silent treatment.
the mechanics of walkigng feel weird right now everyone lools like a demon
what does alcohol mean
You said that you were drinking out of a pan, and then went on to apologise to 'Jesus and all the other guys' for drinking on a Sunday.
just saw a kid get pissed on buy a tiger at the zoo. His dad is rofling and the kid is crying. I think I have to go make a new friend
We can't go back there. Ever. No context required, just know it's true.
Just letting you know that I just spent 11 dollars on a car wash... Because you had sex in my car.
Me and my boss just exchanged pictures of our bongs and such...I don't know I feel about this
Randomize
