I had a dream last night where you were a transsexual in a low cut blue dress with lovely long brown hair. You were very pretty. I hope you are well.
lol earlier she was acting like a normal gf... and then BANG! shes touching herself again...
He just randomly started talking about Haiti and Conan O'Brien and his grandpa's hip replacement operation. It was the worst phone sex I've ever had.
I wasted my skinny years on you. The least you can do is high five me at the bar
Sorry girl, my dick is like a rollercoaster. You only get a picture after you ride
A beer is a heart your wish makes!!!
In the world of sexual, erotic texting, you rank somewhere between "how much teeth do you want" and "how dry do you want it"
I couldn't drown my sorrows in an ocean of jack daniels. They may have scuba gear.
Why is it that every study session with you turns into a hunt for drugs?
Do you find Darth Vader masks attractive?
I have his gate key so know he has to see me again.
I found her outside drinking steak sauce out of the bottle.
How the hell do you misplace a bag of tacos in a closet?
I think I've done enough damage with my vagina as of late, thank you
Where are you? Where am I? Why am I so red?
Randomize
