well that was a long night...
dude, you were pretty messed up... what happened?
no idea... but i still woke up with my pirate hat on
everyone knows that carl winslow was the sexiest man in die hard.
I mean I'm basically single. Or maybe just an asshole. Either way.
how did i get to the car and why are my shoes broken
he got a charlie horse midthrust which triggered my orgasm we're still sorting this out.
Look you found him on craigslist. You should be happy that he at least HAS a normal looking dick.
Covered in gravy. Never pour gravy while drinking.
I puked in my fridge last night while I was trying to get water
He stood up, threw the bag of bud between me and Tory, yelled "Fight" and then ran upstairs for the pizza
He threw up the X he took like 30min before then when we thought his antics were over... BOOM! He tried to pee out a light he was holding.
I bought everclear. Bring your party pants and some addies
You're not gonna punch me in the face again are you?
I will keep you posted and someday if we daydrink teach you how to do a footjob
We need a full length mirror. I just ate it trying to look at my shoes on the toilet. But aside from a arm bruise I'm good to go
You must take up my position now. You must pass out in awkward places as I taught you... Sears a hotel elevator and Burger King bathroom. You potential for greater young grasshopper.
His name was Dragon. For real. How do you not sleep with a Dragon? Don't judge me.
Randomize
