There is now a Twilight themed dildo. What do YOU want for christmas??
I cannot convey how much I really do love Chris Hansen. FYI: he is the JC Chasez of my adult years.
the can pyramid on my head actually reached a decent height before I moved.
I don't judge her for getting booty calls at 2 in the morning, so she can't judge me for staying in friday nights and putting spray cheese on pringles.
I ate her out for so long I might actually shit a vagina
Remember camping when you drank 36 beers to yourself in one day and puked in your tent? Ready for round 2?
holy fuck man...it feels like I got beat the fuck out of by death's baseball bat...chimichangas?
at work, .. 47 yr old boss was in a fight. 2 BLACK EYES. I may get fired. I cant stop laughing
Is biking from my house to 6th street for liquor pitchers a good idea or a bad idea
It got quiet and we all stood around and opened the box and I've never seen so many burritos in my life man. it was fucking biblical.
Some girl dressed in nothing but Wonder Woman underwear and a cape on her ass just started twerking all over us. Remind me why I'd never been to a midnight of Rocky horror before?
Denim handjobs are the worst handjobs. I hate all handjobs. Why do people even.
But like, I don't remember getting hit with the door... I just come out from peeing and there was blood running down my face.
so in 24 hours i have gotten caught having sex in my car by a cop, almost burnt off my vag, almost got hit by a semi, and got fired. awesome.
WAIT this kid is eating yogurt with a fucking ladle. what is happening?
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