Call me when you're up
Great dream, you were in it
I wouldn't fuck her. Looks like her vagina smells like a seaside orgy.
He kept pouting and saying i cockblocked him and I kept yelling "I'm sorry...but the cock was never out to be blocked"
If she says "This is how acid feels" one more time I'm never trip-sitting them again.
You know what? I bet HE would do stormtrooper roleplay with me. I'm in.
holy shit thats the most artistic dick pic ever
after she rolled over and said 'i'm so glad you're like my gay best friend, love you' then left. did i just get friendzoned AFTER sex??
Hahaha I can already see the arrest warrants. It's gonna be beautiful. I'll get them framed.
Boobs are out for the taking
Just had to kick my 26 yr old boyfriend out of my bed before getting the kids up for school. Have I mentioned being 41 doesn't suck as much as all the hype.
You're telling that to the kid drinking Jack in nothing but a graduation cap
Soo are you just gonna poop in my bathtub and not talk to me anymore...?
I just met him at a place called the meat farm, Jesus be a shield.
I just walked in on my dad beating it.. There's not a fucking therapist in ARKANSAS that can help me with that!
Was cussing out our DD when one of the strippers takes him backstage. WTF
They call him magic hands is all I know.
Somethings are best left a mystery
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