I want leopard sheets
haha sexcapades
thats the plan
great time with ya sorry i wasn't one of the three guys you wanted to stay with
So he saw that playlist i made with his name as the title. i think he's creeped out that I have 106 songs that remind me of him
Just discovered Kim Possible porn. Life is now complete.
i stuck my finger in my ass and it felt weird. but you know. it should be different when a guy does it right?
we made it to hole 3 and then just sat down on the fairway and finished off our case....cheered on other golfers as we let them play through.
Not sure. We'll pass out on that bridge when we stumble to it.
No clues in my phone. Only dialed call: my own social security number. And that was before 10:00pm.
how are you shocked you fucked her? sure shes hot, but she also washed your beerpong balls in her mouth..... you should probably get tested.
His dick is hereby named Charles Dickens. Will's is less cerebral. I'd like to call it Pinnacle like the vodka we drank when we hooked up, but I feel like that's a compliment it doesn't deserve.
Aaaaand now he just flexed his muscles at me and said "I'm a fucking eagle!"
Im wearing black today mourning the orgasm i couldn't get this morning :(
the last thing is remember is that strange guy in the leotard...i woke up in my bed, naked, with a half eaten grilled cheese on my nightstand, a six pack in the fridge, a new pack of cigarettes on my pillow and coke in my purse. apparently i bought some drugs, shopped and cooked. typical.
Ooooh no. Jesus take the wheel, or Moses. SOMEBODY TAKE THE WHEEL
wheres my face? and why is my pocket so big?
Randomize
