Dear man in the lobby please go play whith yourself elsewhere
Dude you can't just initiate a threesome via twitter
Whatever, its basically a crime against humanity to miss an andre power hour so she'll get what's coming to her.
I don't know what I would do if cheese never existed
Someone's stooooned
He wanted to drink hypnotic from my butt crack. I need to move out this state.
I'm definitely going to class still drunk right now and the freshman dressed as Hugh Heffner last night is texting me. I can't handle this.
I did sing regulators with a random black dude at The Rail without looking at the screen, hugged him and walked off stage. I pretty much live up to all expectations.
I really just want to eat 20 mcnuggets and slap everyone with the box when I'm done.
You don't know weird until you've had a musical wet dream about your older brother.
Homophobes nationwide are huddled in their bunkers tonight and I can't stop giggling. Could be the wine.
I can insert a female catheter, but I cannot grill a cheese.
His idea of a night out is drinking beer in the driveway. He's been on house arrest too long
Do it!! We better have a duck by the time I get home.
Skipping class. Wanna Drink now?
yea. just give me 15 min to write a paper.
Looks like the opera singer hook up is paying off. Ran into the MILF from 407 and she said “your lady friend sounded like a very lucky girl.”
Randomize
