thx for the lesson on dirrty dancing
halloween costumes for girls are easy, slutty teacher, slutty cop, slutty nurse, etc...
exactly, that's why i want something interesting
slutty neuroscientist?
im at a loss of words.... a stripper is dancing to a Justin Bieber song.
someone should tell her that easter eggs aren't meant to be dildos.
I was just given a safe word. It's going it be an interesting night.
So my retainer doesn't fit, so i'm getting drunk so i can put it back in. Alone.
You would...
He used my blackberry to make a voice recording of me orgasming, then set it as my ringtone while I was sleeping. I discovered this during a staff meeting this morning.
Tequila is the liquid version of celery. I lose more calories during tequila drunk and the following sexual activities than I gain by drinking it...
The pregnant Hooters waitress told me to "make good choices".
I am significantly less than sober now. Gonna make like, ten hotdogs.
Goldenshlager is a hell of a drink. And these are the adventures ur missing out on w me. I gave someone a bath Emily. A BATH.
Awkward
Can't say I wouldn't let it happen again.
It's fine. I wouldn't trust either of them to be my workplace drug buddy.
What I've learned from glowsticks: glowing things are not safe to eat
Had to decide between a hook up at the train restroom or getting to work on time #growingup
I knew deleting his texts was a bad idea and I was right. I just used the last time we talked to help me figure out when I had my last period
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