Without porn, I would have few hobbies.
I've drank myself into a smaller pants size. Who ever said alcoholism was unhealthy was mistaken.
I had never watched a guy jack off to me before, but let me tell you, it was a very uncomfortable experience.
Well, technically I had a shirt on, it was just around my waist.
Apparently "he pulled out..mostly" is not a valid reason for thinking there's no way i can be pregnant to the nurses at the student health center.
Your lack of great college experience of margaritas and foam parties scares me
lit a joint with my parents wedding matches today, this is what happens when you're out of lighter fluid. didnt even feel guilty.
He had a step stool to get in to his bed!
Woke up in your shoes. Please tell me you woke up in mine
I texted him a series of texts in which the first letters of each text spelled out "WE SHOULD HAVE SEX". If that's not dedication to the dick, I don't know what is
I'm hoping the sedatives kick in before I drunkenly decide to eat this whole cheesecake.
Yeah so then I used the selfie stick his mom gave me to take nudes
How was your night?
I spent a lot of money and drank a lot of booze. Also was part of a successful search party
I'm on my third roll of toilet paper. Today can fuck right off.
My boob job is like a master key that gets me in any door, any party and anyone’s pants! They’re magical!
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