my mom asked me how i could steal on a clear conscious and i told her it was because when i was younger she let me watch alladin and he did it.
I just chugged a whole pitcher of beer in 1 min. 9 sec. A whole goddamn pitcher.
i'm laying naked in your bed you should probably come home
move.
when i asked what day 420 fell on this year, she answered so quickly i knew i found my soulmate.
Dude. My sister is off limits. Touch her again and I'll rip off your dick and force feed it to you.
I accept this challenge.
definitely fulfilled the lesbian status quo and fucked her in the back seat of my prius
She wanted to roleplay. Apparently you be snow and i'll be a plow wasn't an option
I've got 2 dollars. How do I turn this into alcohol?
He has a shower chair now. So he sits and watches me shower. It's kind of creepy.
When that wave blew your top off I heard someone yell "SPANK BANK"
As a former fat girl, that's probably the best compliment I've ever received ever!
I think I just got buffalo sauce on my penis. Is that a turn on or off?
Currently sifting through all the dick pics and nudes for a picture of my dad and I to post on social media for Father's Day...
It's a classy one I promise! Their toilets are cushioned an tier wifi is named hummingbird
I blacked out after the piñata full of condoms
I would let him fuck me right here in this laundromat. Praise Satan.
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