He wanted to take me out and said we could "go huntin in the woods."
Oh i forgot. I hit on a mentally challenged girl too.
the girl sitting next to me in class is using her birth control box as a ruler
she was giving me head and that cheryl crow 'youre favorite mistake' song came on. she looks up and all i could do was nod
So, Southern Comfort will donate 25 cents for every bottle sold towards Gulf Coast Relief... Can we save the wetlands through my alcoholism?
I fatbooth all their pics then decide which one is the cutest even if they gained like 400 lbs and then proceed to fuck him.
No, she isn't nearly as crazy as the girl who wanted to wear a vial of my semen as a necklace.
Hey could you buy me 2 bottles of arbor mist? I'm trying to get laid tonight
It's only slutty if you don't have his number. Unless there's a full moon. Then anything goes.
I want a MapMyFart App, where I can mark every spot where I have ripped one. Like here.
I woke up while eating peanut butter from a jar. I don't think I should be social today.
i was so high when i left this morning that rather than make sandwiches i threw bread and peanut butter in my backpack. a whole loaf. and a whole jar
was that you i just saw walking down the street in only one heel smoking a cig yelling "hello sexuals" to everyone who passed??
HELLLLLO SEXUAL BEING
Wow. I want to climb Santa. You've made my mind go places I wasn't prepared to explore.
so we have roughly decided that hes the dude all the chicks will bang in college, just so he will do their term papers
Randomize
