He had in his status he loved beating off and tagged his wife. another reason facebook should be for college.
Apparently I did my philosophy paper last night. It's not bad either.
I forgot to tell you thank you for putting me out when I was on fire. im sure I'll laught about this someday...
Omg 230 lb butch lesbian with a mustache grabbed my dick. I need an adult
When people ask about my bruises, I'm just going to say it was a doorknob. Or possibly a group of doorknobs. Angry doorknobs.
So this is where people who peaked in high school come to drink?
Mike showed up naked and in handcuffs. Again. Feel free to come over and laugh because I'm not helping this time.
Well, my eyeball is red and the rest of my eye is black. Oh the joys of drinking with u. PS- I laid in a pile of sawdust. it was ok at the time.
sorry for laughing and taking pictures while you were having an asthma attack on st. patricks day
So I just stirred my shower drink with my razor.
I'm not going to ask which end you used.
Go christen that room with your naked body.
Sally, Your mom and my mom hooked up in college, we must uphold this tradition.
fyi my negative pregnancy test is taped to the fridge...i'll take it over an A+ any day. be proud.
I don't want a big night. But I am okay if we wake up in a penthouse at Crown Casino.
I'm not gonna lie. I need sex like plants need water right now. I just need the dick.
Randomize
