Why do you apologize after every time we have sex?
He spent the whole night convincing me I wasn't fat, but after we had sex he said "Oh, I see what you mean"
Saw the college gyno today. It has now been medically confirmed that I have a perfect vagina.
My coke dealer 411'd my work number just to see how I was doing and gave me his new number. He must miss my business
I'm stranded in the Hampton area. Looks like I'm going to have to take one for the team and pass out by this applebees.
And my only real exposure to Russian culture is you and Internet porn.
I decided not to eat, and then this man was my fairy " don't black out" godmother
He hasn't touched a vagina in two and a half years. THIS IS WAY TOO MUCH PRESSURE TO BE UNDER
so I may or may not have had intense sex to mozart's greatest hits on vinyl... I don't know if I should be proud or just really disappointed in my nerdness
I gargles a mimosa for breakfast. It's gonna be a killer Monday.
not sure what the chiropractor did but my junk deserves a cape now.
I don't care if he's the coolest coworker, if he's living in his mom's basement at 30 you should not buy drugs from him
I don't know what the hell I'm going to do with myself when this is all over. I'll probably just go back to smoking pot and trying to learn italian.
So, I almost went hone with a French guy and a drag queen. Together. Then I became sober enough to realize, that's not my style.
There's a difference tho. *I* drink at seven in the morning because I work graveyards. YOU drink at seven in the morning cause you're an alcoholic.
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