You up for the gym tonight after work?
I'm up for a light workout and a nice yog.
Fair enough, I'm gonna hit it hard today.
Chris Brown style, or less felonious?
Haha, all felonious.
Its officially tradition: I black out every year on michael jackson's death day..
You found me in the back room alone eating someone else's whole birthday cake with my hands then asked me if you could join.
If we're single and alone together, the fuck angels shall sing upon our nude bodies.
I guess I'm open to more types of dick now
I'm hungover laying in my moms bed watching Space Jam.. Adult Life..
Got too starbucks. 3out of the 4 girls working i have ducked and haven't ever called. My coffee has dick written on it. It may contain spit by pumpkin lattes are only once a year
If it's any consolation, I made really strong brownies yesterday and had 3 and then I saw demons
I WOULD SERIOUSLY RECOMMEND THE SHIT THAT I AM ON RIGHT NOW
who has a one night stand on Christmas ? But he's pretty attractive so thumbs up
Why is it pressure? I want to see your cute face and possibly sit on it. You make it like its a bad thing.
Through a complicated series of events, I wound up in the desert with a blue chick from comic-con. we lost peter. if you're alive, please come get us.
Is it too much to ask for 10 minutes of privacy while I masturbate?
Three cheers for handling my crush on my boss in an entirely reasonable manner, by having a threesome with my coworkers.
I think the heterosexuals across the hall are negotiating about breeding. How do I figure out which one is against it and back them up?
Randomize
