i've alrwady decidided boys hate me plkease take notyes.
what
nvm
I've decided to film a documentary centered around how he manages to keep that beast caged in such tight pants
It's so hard to take my boss as an authorative figure with her New Moon movie tickets taped to her wall
You kept buying everyone Washington apple shots, and telling us we needed to support local produce.
well after he sqeezed a zit off his forearm i got the hell outta there
your ability to fuck hot guys even when you go out in sweats amazes me
This hangover is way worse than all my relationships
I swear I could audibly hear her vagina slam shut when you walked up to hit on her.
she just walked in and said "well, I got peed on again"...
that girl from work that wants to bone me just said 'the last time i went this long without sex was in jail'. sup, red flag
P.S. The slutty NASCAR driver costume will be saved and used year round for role play.
These cutoffs are too tight but my ass looks like Freedom
Have you ever eaten pizza and gotten your dick sucked at the same time? Because I have pizza.
It was a strange night. I made out with his college roommate and said "do you care?" beforehand.
Just saw you run by my class yelling "fuck you!". Good luck and stay human!
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