I was taking a piss and started puking. I pissed myself and made a mess in the bathroom. Passed out, then got up and went back out from 11pm to 5am.
I changed 4 diapers and slept horribly in our hot apt. Now, I'm at my inlaws house watching the Rangers get pummeled. Oh how our lives differ.
Hahaha, sighhhh...I texted him to no response. It's a shame, really...I would gladly exchange my body for pizza rills.
You just left with that feminine looking guy you kept calling "Jessica." Just giving the heads up.
Martha Stewart would most definitely roll a great joint.
yea, the bartender wouldn't serve you because you kept asking for "a slice of beer"
We stopped her at 12
12 shots? Or 12 midnight?
Which answer would freak you out less
Sorry for drunk singing "love hurts" to you at 3 am.
I doubt were getting our security deposit back... the toilet just fell off the wall
I know this request is pointless but you two please try to keep the drinking and drug use to a minimal, I have bail money so write my number on your arm and a "if found call", wear a life jacket and act like a responsible 28 year old please.
It was a cry at the bar alone type of night, served with a side of passing out facedown in my nachos.
I just saw a girl on crutches doing a walk of shame. She is either super dedicated, or her night didn't go as planned.
He said female orgasms are a myth and refuses to even try to give me one.
You were in subway at 3am showing everyone your tan lines
the bandages come off on Tuesday. we can try out my new breasts then.
Beer and Reeses. dinner of champions
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